tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36246106310636533252024-02-19T15:20:37.265+08:00masterwordsmith-unpluggedUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger5266125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-73848719883471552072015-09-19T09:18:00.002+08:002015-09-19T09:18:17.408+08:00Smiles: More Ah Beng Jokes<br />
<br />
Ah Beng always smiles during lightning storms because he thinks his picture is being taken.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why can't Ah Beng dial 9-11?<br />
Because he can't find the number 11 (eleven) on the phone.<br />
<br />
Ah Beng urgently needed a few days off work, but he knew the Boss would not allow him to take leave. He thought that maybe if he acted "CRAZY" then the boss would tell him to take a few days off.<br />
<br />
So he hung upside down on the ceiling and made funny noises.<br />
<br />
His co-worker (Ms Lian) asked him what is he doing?<br />
<br />
He told her that he is pretending to be a light bulb so that the boss would think he was "CRAZY" and give him a few days off.<br />
<br />
A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, "What are you doing?" He told him that he is a light bulb. The boss said "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days".<br />
<br />
Ah Beng jumped down and walked out of the office.<br />
<br />
When his co-worker (Ms Lian) followed him out, the Boss asked her "...And where do you think you're going?"<br />
<br />
She said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark!<br />
<br />
======<br />
<br />
Ah Beng with two red ears went to his doctor.<br />
The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone ring, lah - but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear, lah"<br />
"Oh dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But ... what happened to the other ear?"<br />
Ah Beng answered : "That stupid dumbo called back, lah !!!!"<br />
<br />
======<br />
<br />
Ah Beng talk to a long-distance telephone operator.<br />
Ah Beng : "COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME THE TIME DIFFERENCE BETWEEN TAIPEI AND LAS VEGAS ?"<br />
Operator : "JUST A MINUTE..."<br />
Ah Beng : "THANK YOU , lah" AND PUTS DOWN THE PHONE.<br />
<br />
=====<br />
<br />
After completing a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for quite some time, Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a friend.<br />
<br />
"It took me ONLY 5 MONTHS TO DO IT", Ah Beng brags.<br />
<br />
"FIVE MONTHS? THAT'S TOO LONG", the friend exclaims.<br />
<br />
"YOU ARE A FOOL." Ah Beng replies, "SEE THIS BOX, IT IS WRITTEN FOR 4-7 YRS".<br />
<br />
=========<br />
<br />
At a bar in New York, the man to Ah Beng's left tells the bartender, JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE"<br />
and his companion says, "JACK DANIELS, SINGLE".<br />
The bartender approaches Ah Beng and asks, "AND YOU, SIR ?"<br />
Ah Beng replies : "Tan Ah Beng, MARRIED lah"<br />
<br />
======<br />
<br />
Some classic Ah Beng jokes<br />
<br />
<br />
Why did Ah Beng go to a movie with his 18 friends?<br />
Because below 18 not allowed Lah !<br />
<br />
=======<br />
<br />
Ah Beng wants to buy a TV set. He goes to a shop.<br />
Ah Beng : "Do you have color TV ?"<br />
Salesgirl : "Yes !"<br />
Ah Beng : "Give me a green one, please "<br />
<br />
=============<br />
<br />
Ah Beng goes to a store and sees a shiny object.<br />
Ah Beng : "What is that shiny object ?"<br />
Salesgirl : "That is a thermos flask."<br />
Ah Beng : "What does it do ?"<br />
Salesgirl : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"<br />
Ah Beng : "I'll buy it"<br />
The next day, Ah Beng goes to work with his thermo flask.<br />
Boss : "What is that shiny object ?"<br />
Ah Beng : "It's a thermos flask."<br />
Boss : "What does it do ?"<br />
Ah Beng : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"<br />
Boss : "What do you have in it?"<br />
Ah Beng : "Two cups of coffee and one cup of ice cream"<br />
<br />
======<br />
<br />
After making photocopies of documents, Ah Beng always compares it with the original for spelling mistakes.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
=======</div>
<br />
Ah Beng is filling up an application form for a job.<br />
He supplied the information for the columns on Name, Age, Address, etc.<br />
Then he comes to column on "Salary Expected", but he is not sure of the question.<br />
After much thought, he writes "Yes"<br />
<br />
======<br />
<br />
Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it. When he encountered some problems. He decide to use the 'Help' command. Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer retailer for support.<br />
Ah Beng : "I press the 'F1' key for help lah, but it's been over half an hour and still nobody come and help me Lah ?!"<br />
<br />
<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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<br />
PLEASE DO NOT GOOGLE THIS ONE OR CHECK WITH SNOPES.<br />
<br />
This is not a religious post but one on humour. Posted for laughs with no intention to mock any one or any religion.<br />
<br />
In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy(Dot for short). Dot Com was a comely woman, large of breast, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.<br />
<br />
And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"<br />
<br />
And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"<br />
<br />
And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."<br />
<br />
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.<br />
<br />
To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew to The People (HTTP).<br />
<br />
And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS. <br />
<br />
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.<br />
<br />
And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." <br />
<br />
And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or eBay as it came to be known. He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."<br />
<br />
And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."<br />
<br />
"YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.<br />
<br />
Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside.<br />
<br />
It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).<br />
<br />
That is how it all began. And that's the truth. I would not make up this stuff !!!!!!!!!!<br />
<br />
Author: Unknown<br />
<br />
Thanks to Angela who shared this by email.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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<br />
Leave it to Maxine to come up with a solution for the mess that America/Canada/Australia/NZ<br />
is now in economically. But it sounds all too familiar ...<br />
<br />
It is an oldie and I believe I posted this years ago under a different title. Here goes...<br />
<br />
I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed. What a beauty of a bird feeder it was, as I filled it lovingly with seed. <br />
<br />
Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food.<br />
<br />
But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above the table, and next to the barbecue. <br />
<br />
Then came the shit.<br />
<br />
It was everywhere: on the patio tile, the chairs, the table...everywhere!<br />
<br />
Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket. <br />
<br />
And others birds were boisterous and loud. They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food.<br />
<br />
After a while, I couldn't even sit on my own back porch anymore.<br />
<br />
So I took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone.<br />
<br />
I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built<br />
all over the patio. Soon, the back yard was like it used to be .... quiet, serene... and no one demanding their rights to a free meal.<br />
<br />
Now let's see......<br />
<br />
The government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, and free education, and allows anyone born here to be an automatic citizen. <br />
<br />
Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands. <br />
<br />
Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments<br />
are housing five families; you have to wait six hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor;<br />
your child's second grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn't speak English.<br />
<br />
Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to 'press one' to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than "ours" are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.<br />
<br />
Just my opinion, but maybe it's time for the government to take down the bird feeder.<br />
<br />
Those who DON'T agree, may just continue cleaning up the s**t!<br />
<br />
*Posted for satirical purposes with no ill intentions. Thanks to Angela who shared this via email.<br />
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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<br />
There are some symptoms one should never ignore, and paying attention to these changes in the body is such an important part of detecting serious medical issues like cancer. I know my own body best, so when I saw this list of common cancer symptoms that can help with early detection, I knew I’d be watching out for them.<br />
<br />
Dr. Beth Y. Karlan of Cedars-Sinai’s Cancer Institute says that if you have symptoms that are “persistent and progressive, meaning you wake up every morning and feel something and it has you worried — even for two weeks in a row — it really is worth calling your physician and having it checked out.”<br />
<br />
Like a lot of people, I incorrectly thought that breast cancer symptoms only affected women and I didn’t have to worry about them. I was also wrong in thinking that symptoms associated with colon cancer only affected men. But I was very surprised to see how many symptoms affected both men and women, just like in the case of a heart attack. I’m so glad I know what to look for now!<br />
<br />
Scroll through to see which symptoms should be a red flag for women, men, or for both women and men. While these symptoms don’t always mean cancer is the problem, they are a sign that you should see a doctor right away.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/cancer-symptoms_55ee8c84e4b093be51bbede7" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">CLICK here to read more from Huffington Post.</a><br />
<br />
Thanks to a few friends who shared this link.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-6368893813884765902015-09-08T14:45:00.002+08:002015-09-08T14:45:49.029+08:00Raw Fish and BacteriaWhy is it that GBS bacteria affect fish species, in particular, the snakehead and Asian bighead carp?<br />
<br />
Dr Leong: Bacteria, unlike viruses, are less species specific.<br />
<br />
For example, the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) can be found only in monkeys and humans, but not pigs, mosquitoes or rats.<br />
<br />
Bacteria, however, can work on different animals and are not species-specific.<br />
<br />
GBS has been identified in other fish, especially the tilapia fish, so it has a predisposition to affect fish
- See more at <b><a href="http://yourhealth.asiaone.com/content/raw-fish-and-bacteria/page/0/1#sthash.6HrAUgS2.KIX2Mdtg.dpuf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">THIS LINK.</a></b><br />
<br />
Thanks to a few friends who shared this link.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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In George Washington's days, there were no cameras. One's image was either sculpted or painted... Some paintings of George Washington showed him standing behind a desk with one arm behind his back while others showed both legs and both arms. Prices charged by painters were not based on how many people were to be painted, but by how many limbs were to be painted. Arms and legs are 'limbs,' therefore painting them would cost the buyer more. Hence the expression, 'Okay, but it'll cost you an arm and a leg.' (Artists know hands and arms are more difficult to paint)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
As incredible as it sounds, men and women took baths only twice a year (May and October) Women kept their hair covered, while men shaved their heads (because of lice and bugs) and wore wigs. Wealthy men could afford good wigs made from wool. They couldn't wash the wigs, so to clean them they would carve out a loaf of bread, put the wig in the shell, and bake it for 30 minutes. The heat would make the wig big and fluffy, hence the term 'big wig.' Today we often use the term 'here comes the Big Wig' because someone appears to be or is powerful and wealthy</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
In the late 1700's, many houses consisted of a large room with only one chair. Commonly, a long wide board folded down from the wall, and was used for dining. The 'head of the household' always sat in the chair whiles everyone else ate sitting on the floor. Occasionally a guest, who was usually a man, would be invited to sit in this chair during a meal. To sit in the chair meant you were important and in charge.. They called the one sitting in the chair the 'chair man.' Today in business, we use the expression or title 'Chairman' or 'Chairman of the Board.'</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Personal hygiene left much room for improvement. As a result, many women and men had developed acne scars by adulthood. The women would spread bee's wax over their facial skin to smooth out their complexions. When they were speaking to each other, if a woman began to stare at another woman's face she was told, 'mind your own bee's wax.' Should the woman smile, the wax would crack, hence the term 'crack a smile'. In addition, when they sat too close to the fire, the wax would melt . . . Therefore, the expression 'losing face..'</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Ladies wore corsets, which would lace up in the front. A proper and dignified woman, as in 'straight laced'. . Wore a tightly tied lace.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Common entertainment included playing cards. However, there was a tax levied when purchasing playing cards but only applicable to the 'Ace of Spades.' To avoid paying the tax, people would purchase 51 cards instead. Yet, since most games require 52 cards, these people were thought to be stupid or dumb because they weren't 'playing with a full deck.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Early politicians required feedback from the public to determine what the people considered important. Since there were no telephones, TV's or radios, the politicians sent their assistants to local taverns, pubs, and bars. They were told to 'go sip some ale' and listen to people's conversations and political concerns. Many assistants were dispatched at different times. 'You go sip here' and 'You go sip there.' The two words 'go sip' were eventually combined when referring to the local opinion and, thus we have the term 'gossip.' **************************************************************</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
At local taverns, pubs, and bars, people drank from pint and quart-sized containers. A bar maid's job was to keep an eye on the customers and keep the drinks coming. She had to pay close attention and remember who was drinking in 'pints' and who was drinking in 'quarts,' hence the term 'minding your 'P's and Q's '</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
************************************************************</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
One more: bet you didn't know this!</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
In the heyday of sailing ships, all war ships and many freighters carried iron cannons. Those cannons fired round iron cannon balls. It was necessary to keep a good supply near the cannon. However, how to prevent them from rolling about the deck? The best storage method devised was a square-based pyramid with one ball on top, resting on four resting on nine, which rested on sixteen. Thus, a supply of 30 cannon balls could be stacked in a small area right next to the cannon. There was only one problem...how to prevent the bottom layer from sliding or rolling from under the others. The solution was a metal plate called a 'Monkey' with 16 round indentations.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
However, if this plate were made of iron, the iron balls would quickly rust to it. The solution to the rusting problem was to make 'Brass Monkeys.' Few landlubbers realize that brass contracts much more and much faster than iron when chilled. Consequently, when the temperature dropped too far, the brass indentations would shrink so much that the iron cannonballs would come right off the monkey. Thus, it was quite literally, 'Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey.' (All this time, you thought that was an improper expression, didn't you.)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
If you don't send this fabulous bit of historic knowledge to any and all your unsuspecting friends, your floppy is going to fall off your hard drive and kill your mouse. haha</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Thanks to Angela who sent this via email.</div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-79919905251014574662015-08-27T11:55:00.002+08:002015-08-27T11:55:18.061+08:00In Jest: A Husband's PerspectiveThanks to Mr Krishnan for sharing this.<br />
<br />
We always hear "the rules" from the Wife's side. At last a Husband has taken the time to write down this all finally. Face with stuck-out tongue and tightly-closed eyes.<br />
<br />
Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.<br />
<br />
<b>These are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!</b><br />
<br />
1. Husbands ARE not mind readers.<br />
<br />
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.<br />
<br />
1. Crying is blackmail.<br />
<br />
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!<br />
<br />
1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.<br />
<br />
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.<br />
<br />
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.<br />
<br />
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.<br />
<br />
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.<br />
1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one .<br />
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.<br />
<b><i>Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.</i></b><br />
<b><i><br /></i></b>
1. Whenever possible , Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.<br />
<br />
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.<br />
<br />
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.<br />
<br />
1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.<br />
<br />
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.<br />
<br />
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.<br />
<br />
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, cars, bikes or games.<br />
<br />
1. You have enough clothes.<br />
<br />
1. You have too many shoes.<br />
<br />
1. U r in shape..... Round IS a shape!<br />
<br />
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
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<br />
This will bring back memories!<br />
<br />
Click on the photo and the song will play.... enjoy!!<br />
<br />
<b><a href="http://thenostalgiamachine.com/years/1960.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The Nostalgia Machine </a></b><div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-25433781046635477172015-06-24T10:09:00.005+08:002015-06-24T10:09:57.651+08:00Oldies but GoodiesHere are links to some familiar oldies I hope you can enjoy while surfing the net:<br />
<br />
<b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aI70o49mKnc">LINK 1</a></b><br />
<br />
<b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6DmtPQv7V8">LINK 2</a></b><br />
<br />
<b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GTPyVmkKpo">LINK 2</a></b><br />
<br />
<b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owq7hgzna3E">LINK 4</a></b><br />
<br />
<b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pyUcnoracMM">LINK 5</a></b><br />
<br />
<b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hkDSnYwTrdU">LINK 6</a></b><br />
<br />
More updates later.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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Recently, on a long flight back to KL, I had the luxury of watching a movie - something I have not done for ages.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Unfortunately, fickle me jumped from 'Kidnapped' to "The Grand Budapest Hotel" before I finally settled for "Still Alice".</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Actually, right from the start, I had wanted to watch "Still Alice" but was afraid it was too close to home as I am soooooo very forgetful these days.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
By the time I selected it, I realized I would not finish it when the plane landed. In fact, I missed a good 10 minutes, thanks to waffling around at the start.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Nonetheless, it is a terrific movie that everyone should watch, regardless of your age. I could really identify with the pain and feeling of desolation Julianne Moore successfully projected via her superb characterization of Dr. Alice Howland.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I have friends and relatives who are coping with loved ones with Alzheimer's. For sure, some can be so unkind, and yet, there are others who are so sacrificial and patient.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
If you know of anyone with this debilitating condition, have a heart and reach out.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
This movie will surely change your mind.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
In particular, I was deeply moved at the scene where Julianne Moore gave her inaugural speech. Watch that part <b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUMDgk-AxHw">HERE</a></b>.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Don't miss it! You can watch it online via streaming on downloads or in<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZrXrZ5iiR0o" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> YouTube here</a> for the official trailer or <b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-GUVCsX8M8">HERE for the full movie</a>, </b>with Spanish subtitle<b>s.</b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br />
Live in the moment...it is what you can do...<br />
<br />
Julianne Moore certainly deserves the<b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzR3CUU51IU"> Oscar for Best Actress 2015.</a> </b><br />
<b><br /></b>
A commenter in the Youtube recording of her winning speech said this:<br />
<br />
<i>FINALLY!!! So well deserved too. The people acting as if Julianne Moore only won this Oscar because she was "over-due" are deluded. The rest of the actresses in the category gave nuanced or overly-dramatic performances. What Julianne was able to do in "Still Alice" was nothing short of awe-inspiring. She was able to give an immense depth of humanity to her character without resorting to over-dramatized or preachy acting. She was phenomenal and if you saw the film you would agree too. </i><br />
<b><br /></b>
<br />
OK...here's the review from The Telegraph and a snippet.<br />
<br />
<b><a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/film/still-alice/review/">Still Alice: 'Astonishing'</a></b><br />
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Julianne Moore gives one of her greatest performances playing a professor with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The most intrepid scene in the gorgeous, piercing Still Alice is between Julianne Moore and herself. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The heroine of Lisa Genova’s 2007 novel is a linguistics professor, Dr Alice Howland, who must master what the poet Elizabeth Bishop called “the art of losing”. She’s diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Alice, who has reached the point of forgetting her children’s names and how to spell “October”, finds a video file on her laptop. She’s not meant to be watching it, or not yet: it’s supposed to be the last message she’ll ever see, when her mind has already deteriorated to a point past endurance. The person on the video is her earlier self – an Alice soon after diagnosis, in the controlled infancy of her illness. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
On one level, this is a kind of trap Alice has laid, to bring on the end in the kindest way for her family. But it’s also a missive of caring and love from a person to her future self. Moore delivers it with consoling patience, as if addressing a child, and at the same time listens, with a trusting smile of befuddled self-recognition. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
It’s perhaps the centrepiece moment of an astonishingly delicate and sad performance. To Moore’s precious gallery of portraits – the ailing, lost Carol White of Safe (1995), the strung-out Amber Waves of Boogie Nights (1997), the emotionally imprisoned Cathy Whitaker of Far From Heaven (2002) – Alice Howland must now be added. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Her close-ups are minutely calibrated, even by this actress’s celebrated, unshowy standards. The increments of the performance are tiny marvels. It’s these that make the precipitous then-and-now of this iBook face-off shattering to behold. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The film follows a very straight trajectory into this cruellest of all neurological disorders – rendered especially cruel when Alice, who has three children, finds out she has a rare, hereditary kind. There’s no messing around with fragmentary form, or the memory-as-puzzle-box gimmicks of which cinema can be over-fond, save for a few flickers of childhood home video footage on the beach. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Despite an overly insistent chamber-led score, it’s extremely moving in the gentlest, most linear way, and the other performances are sterling, too. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The bristling impatience of Alec Baldwin’s persona is ideally harnessed as John, Alice’s husband, whose scoffing denial of her initial diagnosis elicits lightning rage from his wife – she’s used to him not listening. Kate Bosworth, as their tightly-wound eldest daughter, and Kristen Stewart, as her sister Lydia, do lovely, complementary work. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Beyond memory loss, it’s a film whose subject is words – their meaning and function, everything they helplessly give away about the brain and its rebellions. The first one Alice forgets, at a lecture podium, is “lexicon”. She goes from a 66-point Words With Friends score, with a well-placed HADJ, to a shadow of the player she used to be, laying down TONE for a mere 6. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
She tests herself, at first, chalking “cathode”, “pomegranate”, “trellis” on the kitchen board, and setting a timer to see if she can recall them. When Stewart's Lydia, months later, recites passages from Angels in America to her mother, they have become mere sounds, but she’s still able to recognise them as sounds conveying something to do with love. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Directing here, and doing their best work ever, is the married team of Richard Glatzer and Wash Westmoreland, for whom this project is especially personal: Glatzer suffers from a related neurodegenerative ailment, ALS. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Their film will mean a lot to a lot of people – not just anyone whose life Alzheimer’s has affected, but anyone whom it could affect, ever. Working with the magisterial French cameraman Denis Lenoir (Carlos), they get every shot to take its still, measured toll. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b><a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/film/still-alice/review/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">More here including a trailer.</a></b></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-27945174679962115912015-06-20T08:30:00.004+08:002015-06-20T08:30:30.180+08:00Health Benefits of FenugreekA friend of mine had been experiencing problems with high cholesterol and high blood pressure. Some time later when I met her again, she was much better, thanks to fenugreek.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here is some information which might interest those in the same boat.<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
What is Fenugreek?<br />
<br />
Fenugreek Health Benefits<br />
<br />
Fenugreek (also known as Greek Hay and Fenigreek), is an herb that is commonly found growing in the Mediterranean region of the world. While the seeds and leaves are primarily used as a culinary spice, it is also used to treat a variety of health problems in Egypt, Greece, Italy, and South Asia.<br />
<br />
Fenugreek seeds have been found to contain protein, vitamin C, niacin, potassium, and diosgenin (which is a compound that has properties similar to estrogen). Other active constituents in fenugreek are alkaloids, lysine and L-tryptophan, as well as steroidal saponins (diosgenin, yamogenin, tigogenin, and neotigogenin).<br />
<br />
What are the Benefits of Fenugreek?<br />
<br />
Due to its estrogen-like properties, fenugreek seeds have been found to help increase libido and lessen the effect of hot flashes and mood fluctuations that are common symptoms of menopause and PMS. In India and China it has also been used to treat arthritis, asthma, bronchitis, improve digestion, maintain a healthy metabolism, increase libido and male potency, cure skin problems (wounds, rashes and boils), treat sore throat, and cure acid reflux. Fenugreek also has a long history of use for the treatment of reproductive disorders, to induce labor, to treat hormonal disorders, to help with breast enlargement, and to reduce menstrual pain. Recent studies have shown that Fenugreek helps lower blood glucose and cholestrol levels, and may be an effective treatment for both type 1 and 2 diabetes. It is also being studied for its cardiovascular benefits.<br />
<br />
Uses of Fenugreek<br />
<br />
HOME REMEDY FOR BALANCING CHOLESTEROL<br />
<br />
<b><a href="http://www.homeremediesweb.com/fenugreek_health_benefits.php" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">CLICK HERE to read more.</a></b></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-41191585522864978922015-06-18T11:02:00.002+08:002015-06-18T11:02:43.112+08:00The Detective ExamI do not subscribe to discrimination of any sort and am sharing the following joke solely for laughs. My deepest apologies if any blond reads this post. Thanks!<br />
<br />
A policeman was interrogating 3 blondes who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first blonde a picture for 5 second and then hides it.<br />
<br />
"This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"<br />
<br />
The first blonde answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"<br />
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture shows his PROFILE."<br />
<br />
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second blonde and asks her, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"<br />
<br />
blond<br />
<br />
The second blonde giggles, flips her hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!"<br />
<br />
The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?? Of course only one eye and one ear are SHOWING because it's a picture of his profile!! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"<br />
<br />
Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third blonde and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"<br />
<br />
He quickly adds "...think hard before giving me a stupid answer."<br />
<br />
The blonde looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "Hmmmm...the suspect wears contact lenses."<br />
<br />
The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. "Well, that's an interesting answer...wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that."<br />
<br />
He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file in his computer, and comes back with a beaming smile on his face. "Wow! I can't believe it...it's TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"<br />
<br />
"That's easy," the blonde replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear!"<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-23967049422556514252015-06-15T09:45:00.005+08:002015-06-15T09:45:36.914+08:00How to test for *Recycled' cooking oil...Thanks to Angela who shared this via email.<br />
<br />
This message is about the unethical way of producing cooking oil using recycled oil materials.<br />
<br />
How do we determine if we are the victims?<br />
<br />
Place our cooking oil in the fridge for about 2 hours, if there is whitish<br />
bubbles or foaming, you know then it is made from recycled oil waste<br />
materials.<br />
<br />
The simple test :-<br />
Place a clove of garlic when frying vegetables.<br />
If the garlic turns red, it means the toxic level of recycled oil is very high.<br />
<br />
Garlic should remain white if the oil is of good quality.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-17425722025761003532015-06-14T08:00:00.002+08:002015-06-14T08:01:34.864+08:00Tips on How Cancer Cells can Transform back into Normal Cells <div style="text-align: justify;">
Thanks to three friends for sharing the following post. I googled to find the source but discovered this was shared by someone who probably used Google translate to translate the original article from Mandarin into English.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I am sorry I do not have the time to correct this article. What is impt is the message in it - not the quality of the language. I sincerely hope it helps readers. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
____________________________________</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The main cause of cancer: Super poisoning + tissue hypoxia + sad</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
On Super poisoning, for example, eating food containing heavy metals into, because heavy metal is too heavy, the blood could not move, just stay in the organization, and the cells encounter invading foreign matter, will be surrounded by twisted to form a tumor cancer!</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Cancer is shilly songs wrinkled shrink reduction cells , by the:</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
1. optimism : climbers such as mountaineering and like-minded people chatting, laughing and joking;</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
2, Oxygenating : mountaineering will gasp and covered in sweat is the best oxygenating and detoxifying movement, through the filling of oxygen, shrunken cell carcinoma can play like a balloon, like oxygen, expanded back, become normal cells;</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
3, partial vegetarian : cereals and vegetables could be converted to basic physical and detoxification, cancer cells can change back into normal cells rounded!</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Cancer (Cancer) As the Latin prefix "crab" (Cancri) within the meaning of meaning, a little attention, they quietly, deadly rampage.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Life, one person every four people may get cancer in the past decade, the number of middle-aged have thirty to fifty-year-old cancer growth of 81%, but in fact 40% of all cancers are preventable.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
In fact, every day will produce seven or eight thousand cancer cells apiece, especially in anxiety, anger and pressure, cancer cells increase, in certain parts of the human body Pandora box.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
If before in a happy mood, filled with oxygen to make it swell shrinkage of cancer, anti-cancer foods to eat every day to repair wrinkled cancer cells back into normal cells rounded, cancer in the third period , can recover.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
A, anti-cancer food:</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Lemon (12 kinds of cancer cell destruction: including colon, breast, prostate, lung and pancreatic ...)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Sweet potatoes (detoxification best)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Garlic (treatment of gastric cancer)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Soybeans (governance cervical cancer)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Mushroom (governance cervical cancer)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Cauliflower (treatment of pancreatic cancer)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Spinach (cancer treatment)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Water bamboo (cancer treatment)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Kelp (breast cancer treatment)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Asparagus (cure skin cancer)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Cauliflower (rule bladder cancer)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Edamame (breast cancer treatment)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Cranberry (breast cancer treatment)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Pistachios (anti-cancer)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Cooked tomatoes (prostate cancer treatment)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Mushrooms (liver cancer treatment, but containing heavy metals renal injury, up to a month to eat 200g)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Beetroot, carrots, yogurt, apples, green algae, grapes, bananas, kiwi, pineapple, strawberry, green tea, ten sago (governance colorectal cancer: brown rice, black glutinous rice, millet, wheat, buckwheat, Gorgon, oats, lotus , cereals and red barley), white sesame, linseed, ginger, Chinese wolfberry, corn, almonds, black sesame seeds, pumpkin seeds.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Please eat more foods containing these active ingredients, so that a lot of cancer cells in the body ready for sleep.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
1, curry (anticancer ingredient is .. "curcumin")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
2, peppers (anticancer ingredient is .. "capsaicin")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
3, ginger (anticancer ingredient is .. "Ginger Oil")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
4, green tea (anti-cancer ingredient is .. "catechins")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
5, soybean (anticancer ingredient is .. "isoflavones")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
6 tomatoes (anticancer ingredient is .. "lycopene")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
7, grapes (anticancer ingredient is .. "resveratrol")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
8 garlic (anti-cancer ingredient is .. "sulphide")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
9, cauliflower (anticancer ingredient is .. "sulphide")</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
B, filled with oxygen:</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
When the person sitting in the chair, each breath into the air only half a liter, only a twelfth lung, Li Feng said, "It's like a person has housed twelve room house, but busy to go out every day work, come home, it is only used in the bedroom.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
To use every part of the lungs (to provide adequate oxygen), the only way is a good place to spare the air campaign pant (such as mountain climbing).</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
C, happy mood:</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Reception first doctoral graduate of the Faculty of Medicine at National Taiwan University doctors, in complete nuclear magnetic resonance scanner to check his patients after he saw the machine still open, so aligning the way for his own liver to be scanned and found His students have a liver tumor, so in shock, apart from very natural to do in accordance with the general procedure of Western medicine with other chemotherapeutic slice, the results can not relax mood, only three months to live, he had passed away.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
An Elementary suffering from three lung cancer physicians adopt a macrobiotic diet (eat 90% raw and 10% cooked whole foods), he drank six cups with tomato, carrot, red beet root mainly labeled as 500c c day. Vegetable juice, with plenty of fruits and vegetables based food, can strengthen the immune system, one day bowel movement three times, changes in diet and lifestyle only six months, the tumor disappeared without a trace.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
An Elementary say to 30,000 rpm or more per minute of fruit juice machine juice to the fruit and vegetable fibers and seeds contained in the plant biochemical factors led to release, can antioxidant, eliminating free radicals.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
He drank two glasses of vegetable juice every morning for breakfast, lunch an hour before another drink, noon then eat tomatoes, carrots, alfalfa sprouts and other vegetables to make a salad.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Doctors at National Taiwan University Department of Pathology, Miss Li Feng had suffered from lymphoma. With the disease, or removed deathbed, or premature death; she was able to good to be alive.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Her secret: She daily hiking (hiking pant is the best oxygenating movement) and reading Buddhist scriptures - its meaning is not to worry.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
On the contrary, like my friends in the spirit suffered a major blow, suffering from lymphatic cancer, the National Taiwan University Hospital suffering life last 11 months, very unfortunate!</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
She has two famous saying: "When people happy, cells are round, like eighteen-year-olds; people angry, cell like eighty-year-old old man, wrinkled shrink shrink!"</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
( cancer that is wrinkled shrink shrink shilly songs, whole grains and vegetables, exercise (oxygen) plus optimistic, cancer cells can return to a normal round cells ).</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Occurred in London a couple, they both do the annual physical examination, his wife was told to get breast cancer, the life of only one year, Mr. was told to get prostate cancer, but there are three heart aortic occlusion, and life expectancy is only next year.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
After discussion, the two decided to do nothing, could not hear what Western medicine sick, they wrote in this year they will complete fifty something on a piece of paper, so they sell only Some homes, take the money and do the round the world trip.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Because this is the first thing they want to do, so happy to leave after six months and then travel around to go back to London because the body feels good, then go back to check with a physician that the results surprised doctors The duo found that cancer had disappeared, while her husband's artery blockage was good, too, a result that physicians can not understand why this happen!</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-42271203719474056592015-06-13T10:55:00.002+08:002015-06-13T10:55:38.260+08:00Nineteen Facts That Will Amaze YouThanks to Angela sent me an email about 19 facts about India.<br />
<br />
I traced it to a couple of websites.<br />
<br />
<b><a href="http://mentalmasala.com/quizzes/sangita-venkatraman/india-facts-amaze" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">CLICK HERE to read more.</a></b><div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
© 2008-2014 Masterwordsmith-Unplugged | All Rights Reserved</p>
Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-44136592422522586332015-06-12T15:08:00.003+08:002015-06-12T15:08:36.602+08:00Friday LaughterLittle Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question:<br />
<br />
"Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left ?" "None.", replied Johnny. "'cause the rest would fly off."<br />
<br />
"The correct answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like your thinking."<br />
<br />
Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married ?<br />
<br />
Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking her cone?"<br />
<br />
"No," said Little Johnny, "The one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you think!"<br />
__________________<br />
<br />
TEACHER: Why are you late?<br />
BALGOBIN: Because of the sign.<br />
TEACHER: What sign?<br />
BALGOBIN: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."<br />
<br />
<br />
TEACHER: Balgobin, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?<br />
BALGOBIN: You told me to do it without using tables!<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: Balgobin, how do you spell "crocodile"?<br />
BALGOBIN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"<br />
TEACHER: No, that's wrong<br />
BALGOBIN: Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!<br />
<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?<br />
BALGOBIN: "HIJKLMNO! "!!<br />
TEACHER: What are you talking about?<br />
BALGOBIN: Yesterday you said it's H to O!<br />
<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: Balgobin, go to the map and find North America.<br />
BALGOBIN: Here it is!<br />
TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?<br />
CLASS: Balgobin!<br />
<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: Balgobin, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.<br />
BALGOBIN: Me!<br />
<br />
<br />
TEACHER: Balgobin, why do you always get so dirty?<br />
BALGOBIN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.<br />
<br />
<br />
-BALGOBIN: Dad, can you write in the dark?<br />
FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?<br />
BALGOBIN: Your name on this report card.<br />
<br />
TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?<br />
BALGOBIN: Don't bite any.<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: Balgobin, give me a sentence starting with "I".<br />
BALGOBIN: I is...<br />
TEACHER: No, Balgobin. Always say, "I am."<br />
BALGOBIN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of "COINCIDENCE?"<br />
BALGOBIN: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."<br />
<br />
<br />
TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"<br />
BALGOBIN: "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"<br />
<br />
<br />
-BALGOBIN: Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?<br />
FATHER: No. Why do you ask that?<br />
BALGOBIN: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?<br />
<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots!<br />
BALGOBIN: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.<br />
<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped<br />
him, what virtue would I be showing?<br />
BALGOBIN: Brotherly love?<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: Now, Balgobin, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?<br />
BALGOBIN: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.<br />
<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: Balgobin, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?<br />
BALGOBIN: No, teacher, it's the same dog!<br />
<br />
<br />
-TEACHER: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?<br />
BALGOBIN: A teacher<br />
<br />
<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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4 correct out of 10 questions to pass.<br />
<br />
1) How long did the Hundred Years' War last?<br />
<br />
2) Which country makes Panama hats?<br />
<br />
3) From which animal do we get cat gut?<br />
<br />
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?<br />
<br />
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?<br />
<br />
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?<br />
<br />
7) What was King George VI's first name?<br />
<br />
8) What color is a purple finch?<br />
<br />
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?<br />
<br />
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?<br />
<br />
Remember, you need only 4 correct answers to pass.<br />
Check your answers below ....<br />
<br />
<br />
ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ<br />
<br />
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years<br />
<br />
2) Which country makes Panama hats?Ecuador<br />
<br />
3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses<br />
<br />
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November<br />
<br />
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur<br />
<br />
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs<br />
<br />
7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert<br />
<br />
8 ) What color is a purple finch?Crimson<br />
<br />
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand<br />
<br />
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?<br />
Orange (of course)<br />
<br />
Did you pass or fail?<br />
<br />
I failed! :-)<br />
<br />
Pass this on to your brilliant friends.<br />
<br />
Thanks to Mr Tio for sharing.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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<br />
Ten persons who were driven mad by the government -<b><a href="http://listverse.com/2015/06/08/10-people-who-were-driven-mad-by-the-government/?utm_source=cbpicks&utm_medium=link&utm_campaign=direct" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> read all about them at THIS LINK.</a></b><br />
<br />
<br /><div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-31221576902999779072015-06-11T17:52:00.000+08:002015-06-11T17:52:00.047+08:00What You Need to Know about MERSBasic information <b><a href="http://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/mers/about/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">over here</a></b>.<br />
<br />
FAQ <b><a href="http://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/mers/faq.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">over here.</a></b><br />
<br />
Pregnant woman amongst <b><a href="http://www.aljazeera.com/news/2015/06/pregnant-woman-mers-cases-south-korea-150611045846708.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">latest MERS cases in S. Korea</a></b>.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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Basically stars were asked questions by the host, and the contestants had to guess whether their answer was correct or not.<br />
But the real power of the show was the one-liners that the stars answered the question with, before giving their real answer…..remember it was the 60’s….some smart cookies here!<br />
Some of the best responses are below.<br />
<br />
Q. Do female frogs croak?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.<br />
<br />
Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?<br />
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.<br />
<br />
Q. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness.<br />
(The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!)<br />
<br />
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.<br />
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.<br />
<br />
Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?<br />
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.<br />
<br />
Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?<br />
A. Rose Marie: No. Wait until morning.<br />
<br />
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?<br />
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.<br />
<br />
Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'?<br />
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.<br />
<br />
Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'?<br />
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.<br />
<br />
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?<br />
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.<br />
<br />
Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.<br />
<br />
Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?<br />
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.<br />
<br />
Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?<br />
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.<br />
<br />
Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at Nudist camps. One is<br />
politics, what is the other?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.<br />
<br />
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?<br />
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.<br />
<br />
Q Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?<br />
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.<br />
<br />
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?<br />
<br />
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.<br />
<br />
Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?<br />
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.<br />
<br />
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.<br />
<br />
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?<br />
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.<br />
<br />
Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?<br />
<br />
Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?<br />
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him .<br />
<br />
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?<br />
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.<br />
<br />
Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?<br />
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.<br />
<br />
Thanks to mr SKT who shared this post via email.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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<br />
<b><a href="http://www.healthyfoodteam.com/she-drank-carrot-juice-every-day-for-8-months-you-wont-believe-what-happened/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">How Carrot Juice can beat Colon Cancer.</a></b><div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-34673809414103277522015-06-10T13:22:00.000+08:002015-06-10T13:22:00.169+08:00Ten Fascinating Facts About Ancient Cuisine<b><a href="http://listverse.com/2015/05/28/10-fascinating-facts-about-ancient-cuisine/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">CLICK HERE</a></b> to read more about 10 fascinating facts about ancient cuisine.<br />
<br />
Have a blessed day.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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<br />
Older, life gets physically more challenging and God is good.<br />
<br />
There were a few close calls this year.<br />
<br />
It is during such times that I can see who are my caring friends.<br />
<br />
Thanks to Hwee Hong Goh who reached out and asked about my well-being. It is because of such an unexpected act of kindness that I garnered enough strength to open up my blog again to post something.<br />
<br />
It has been a very long journey.<br />
<br />
Through it all, I can attest to the fact that the world has become a colder place. It is saddening to see how many choose not to be kind but mean or indifferent.<br />
<br />
My guess is the ease of access to sites has kind of made netizens feel empowered.<br />
<br />
Frankly, much as I am thankful for the Internet, I long for the pre-Internet days when people had time for each other.<br />
<br />
Nonetheless, I am not the weak person I used to be. Not emo any more but VERY much stronger and able to move on without looking back.<br />
<br />
Suffering one physical challenge after another has made me stronger, Some who are aware seem to have no compassion. Matters not. What matters is I spend each day of my life thankful that everyday is a bonus from God.<br />
<br />
And if I were to leave this world at any time, I know I have lived my life to the fullest with no regrets.<br />
<br />
If not for this blog, I would not know that there are such precious people like SKT, Goh, YK Lim etc who are really more than angelic souls in this place called the journey of life.<br />
<br />
To all my readers and friends, may the Almighty bless you always.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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<br />
Brought tears to my eyes.<br />
<br />
At my age, it is rare that I cry unlike in the past. In the last few years, I have put to death sentimentalism of any sort but this one speech really tugged at my heart.<br />
<br />
*speechless<br />
<br />
<b><a href="http://www.vrijmetselaarsgilde.eu/Maconnieke%20Encyclopedie/FMAP~1/REFORM/reform3/lee1_0919.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">CLICK HERE to read.</a></b><div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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Be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed if you like my blog content.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04634500080780558798noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3624610631063653325.post-68104915627989057172015-04-07T16:46:00.000+08:002015-04-07T16:46:02.906+08:00What It TakesHappiness. That nine-letter word holds a lot of weight, doesn't it? For some, it holds expectation, both positive and negative. For some, it holds false realities, both painfully honest, and painfully deceitful. For some, it's a destination that can feel like it's waiting at the end of a rainbow. And for others, it's a process that can feel so miserable and all-consuming in the moment, but be achingly beautiful in retrospect.<br />
<br />
While happiness seems to be what most people want and expect out of life, why are so many lacking it? Is happiness a tangible "thing" that's wandering the streets and expected to show up and ring your doorbell? Well, if you think so, I'd like to ask how that's working for you? Happiness isn't as easily obtainable as one might think; it's actually quite the opposite.<br />
<br />
Happiness. Who said it should be easy? I've heard that love should be easy too, but that's a whole other conversation, and article. Please, listen to me with a compassionate ear and an open heart when I tell you that happiness is in no way, shape, or form, easy to attain when you lack it. The road to happiness is full of excruciating choices and life-altering decisions. It's full of backlash, harsh critics, thick judgments, and HARD-ASS WORK.<br />
<br />
Happiness. So what does it take? It takes passion - and the courage to work hard and see your passion through. That seven-letter word might only show up for you in articles like this, or it may be a daily devotion, but passion is the key to happiness. Passion is a fulfillment of your desire, whatever that may be. It can feel like a "need" that you feel incomplete without.<br />
<br />
Passion can be your children, your partner, your career, a hobby, or anything else in this world. You can lie to yourself every second of the day and say you're happy without passion, but it's just that, a lie. If you haven't one ounce of passion for anything, you're not only unhappy, but you're also missing out on life.<br />
<br />
Happiness. Where do you find it? As cliché as it sounds, happiness - as well as meaning and passion - are within you. Happiness is a self-fulfilling prophecy that is only attained by you. Not one material thing can "make" you happy. Not one other person is "responsible" for your happiness. And if you buy into that, you're buying into a false reality.<br />
<br />
To seek happiness is one of the most profound life journeys we humans take on. And yet, as much importance as we give it, we seldom take responsibility for it. We act as if someone other than ourselves controls whether or not we are happy or living our passion, and we wait for it to be delivered to us on that silver platter we're always talking about. You can't wait for happiness; happiness waits for you. It waits, and waits, never budging.<br />
<br />
Happiness. Where do you start? To find what is already within you, ask yourself the hard questions. Questions that make you uneasy and uncomfortable, such as, "What am I most fearful of? What gets me angry? What gets me excited? What do I avoid? What do I seek out? What makes me sad? What are my wildest dreams?"<br />
<br />
Most likely, as you begin to answer these questions, you will see a common thread. You'll find that one common denominator or relationship among most of your answers that continues to overlap and makes its way back to affecting you in one way or another. Once you pick through the muck of the self-deprecating judgment of your answers to the hard questions, your eyes will open up a little wider, and some realizations will shine through. You'll begin to see where you belong, what you're passionate about, and what you need to feel fulfilled and happy.<br />
<br />
Happiness. How do you achieve it? Once you've answered the hard questions, it's simple: you refuse to settle. You become bold and brave and fight for everything that gets your heart pumping. You dive headfirst into your passions. You take risks!<br />
<br />
For me, happiness is my family, my journey as a therapist, and my writing. It took me a long time from the moment I began seeking my happiness to realize what I was passionate about. It was always in me, but I wasn't aware enough or ready to take responsibility for that daunting task just yet. It took me learning some hard life lessons and making mistake after mistake to be ready to seek out the truth.<br />
<br />
Happiness. What's stopping you? There is a four-letter word called fear, and it tends to be a paralyzing agent that can stop you dead in your tracks if you let it. The unknown and the unexpected are as scary as anything;, yes, that's true. There is no comfortable place in the unknown when you're fighting for your passion, but what most don't know is that fear is the only obstacle in between you and your happiness. That's it. And you can conquer fear.<br />
<br />
Understandably, you are terrified to fail, and undeniably tortured by the thought of it. But it's ok to feel scared. It's ok to feel uncomfortable. It's ok to feel doubt. And it's ok to fail. Let me say that one more time. It's ok to fail. So just start.<br />
<br />
Happiness. What does it look like? You tell me. Happiness is your passion being fulfilled. Whatever that means, whatever that entails, and whatever that looks like is up to you.<br />
<br />
You see, happiness is absolutely attainable; it just takes a little effort. Sometimes it takes a lot of effort. Happiness is what you make it. It's a process and a state of being.<br />
<br />
If you've yet to begin the process, I hope this inspires you to take one step toward finding your happiness, whether that step is big or small. If you're in the trenches on your journey, and it's looking ugly and messy, keep going because you're on the right track. And if you're there, reach out and inspire others to seek their happiness. Tell your story -- because no two stories are alike. Happiness is the state of being that gives you the most fulfillment.<br />
<br />
I chose happiness. I fought for it, risked everything, cried, beat myself up, and doubted myself. I failed, re-routed my plans time and time again, felt crazy, and finally for the first time, I felt alive. I began living, passionately. Happiness didn't find me. I found happiness.<br />
<br />
Happiness lives in you, and now, I challenge you to go find it.<br />
<br />
Thanks to Mr TSK for sharing this.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="blogger-post-footer"><p>
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